Growth Mindset: A New Way to Think About Failures and Learning

I believe in a growth mindset approach to life.  It’s a concept I only really discovered recently.  As usual, I learned more about the application through teaching than I would have learned otherwise.  After all, if I’m going to preach it…I guess I’d better apply it myself.  (I can’t be anything other than genuine.  It's just my nature.)

When teaching the concept of growth mindset, I like to use the analogy of a baby.  Who doesn’t love babies?!!! (Believe it or not, there are a few out there who do not!)  I like to introduce the idea of imagining a baby learning to walk.  You see, they wobble and stumble and trip and fall…a lot.  They fall a LOT.  (It’s one of the most anxious times for a new, overly protective mother…I have been there!)

So, then, I casually say, “Of course, when they trip and fall, you yell and scream at them and call them stupid, right???”

Of course not.  They are babies.  They are only learning, and they are going to wobble and fall down.

So, why are you so hard on yourself every time you trip and fall and mess things up???  You are only learning and growing, too, right?

Of course, there are exceptions.  If you refuse to put in any effort to grow and change, you are stagnating yourself.  I don’t believe there is ever a time in life when we stop needing to progress.  Benjamin Franklin pointed out his inability to master all of his main character trait goals, because as he focused on one, he would find himself slipping in the others.  Growth and development are an ever present requirement for an overall healthy, productive life.  We continue to work on the interconnected systems of mind, body and spirit that make up humanity.  

There is always something to learn, and the more we are willing to identify an area for growth and put learning at the forefront, the more beautifully well-rounded and diversely skilled we become.

The concept of learning is pretty simple to me.  Select an area of growth, whether it be a character trait (honesty, integrity, kindness), a behavior goal (anger management, emotion regulation, positive mindset) or a new skill (writing, drawing, hobbies, sports, learning a new language).  Submerse yourself in the new concept. Read about it, watch videos, study other people who have come closest to mastery, find a mentor/teacher.  Put in efforts in manageable increments, one tiny step at a time.  Over the long run, you will begin to expand your knowledge and refine your skill.  

Keep your expectations low at first.  You may get frustrated if you find yourself lacking in comparison to others.  Don’t compare!  Keep the growth mindset that you are where you are, and from there, you (and anyone else) can improve.  It’s the process of learning and growth that is the goal, not necessarily what you produce along the way.  Growing good fruits takes time, and the first few years you have to let the tree focus on growth.  Eventually, you will see the rewards of your efforts.

So…keep growing!!  Allow yourself to be vulnerable to error, mistakes, and imperfection, push through frustration and embarrassment, and persevere - keeping in mind you might never be the greatest master of the skill, but that is NOT a realistic expectation anyway.  Stay focused on mastering YOU - a valuable part of the human puzzle.